December 2, 2023

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The Timeline of an AP Test

by Jake Arters
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2:30 pm the day before, The bell rings and the day before is here. You’ve had the date of the test circled on your calendar since September. You’ve taken the course, and done your preparation, and now it’s time to actually take the test. You head home intent on studying all night.

3:15 pm, You’ve eaten your post school snack you absolutely deserved after a long day of school and turn on your laptop, sitting down at your desk. You open up a new google chrome window and start typing in the search bar. You type “ap” and click on your most recent used link on your test. You open up a new tab for Pandora, (or Spotify if you’re more of a hipster) and put on classical music radio. As Beethoven’s 5th plays on you attempt to focus.

3:30 pm, You decided to switch to a more comfortable study zone, so now you’re laying down on the couch. The sweet sounds of Bach are playing through your speakers as your snack starts to hit you. You’re on question 8 of the practice test and you’re pretty sure you have about more than half right, but you close your eyes. You realize you’re falling asleep and like any responsible student you set an alarm for a fifteen minute power nap.

3:46 pm, iPhones are totally reliable and your alarm is going off, at the lowest possible volume. You don’t even hear it and sleep through it like a champ.

5:07 pm, You wake up from your longer than expected nap dazed and confused. You have to get back into studying and your house clearly isn’t cutting it. You text a friend and decide to have a group sesh at Starbucks. You get in your car and drive over.

5:24 pm,  The line at Starbucks is oddly long for a Thursday night, but eh, it’s worth it. You pull out your phone and open up your Starbucks app, noticing you only need two more drinks for a free reward, you plan your next trip. As you look at the almost perfect looking delicacies you question how something that has been out for hours can look so good. Oh well, who cares, you think as the Barista recognizes you and begins to put in your order without asking. There is a few perks of being addicted to coffee.

5:29 pm, Your friend has arrived and you start in on your Iced Caramel Latte with two espresso shots. You sit down with your laptops, ready to go.

5:40 pm, Okay. You almost started a practice test but you realized the test was for AP Lit instead of AP Language, at which point you look up the difference between the two.

6:03 pm, Your drink has run out and you get up to order another. You promise yourself you’ll actually get to work after this.

6:15 pm, As your name gets called for you drink you take a look at the newspaper and make a snide comment about the newest Presidential candidate announcing their all too expected run as if it was a surprise to everyone. The Barista happened to hear you, and also happens to be a raging supporter of the same candidate you just called an idiot.

6:38 pm, After a heated political debate, during which your friend had packed their things and left, you agree to disagree with your favorite Barista, silently wondering how a Starbucks worker could be so ignorant. You also pack your things and leaving, declaring audibly that it was no place to work.

7:15 pm, You arrive home and to your delight smell dinner on the table. You remember a full stomach leads to a happy brain, so you take your time eating.

8:00 pm, You’re full of food and hopped up on coffee, ready to learn.

8:15 pm, Wiping the dust off the prep book you purchased at the recommendation of your teacher, you vow to attack the test the old fashioned way, without the distraction of evil technology!

8:21 pm, Yeah that literally lasted 6 minutes, you get on your phone and complain to your designated class groupchat appropriately named “Lol Test is Tomorrow,” “honestly, like what is even going to be on this, we haven’t learned anything (cry face emoji, cry face emoji).”

9:00 pm, You spent 39 minutes talking about everything that you “didn’t even learn.”

9:29 pm, You stumble on to Crash Course, thanking John Green as if he was the savior reborn.

9:48 pm, about halfway though the second video, you notice your favorite song on the related videos and decide you deserve a break. ‘ a thing right? Taking breaks is good for studying. You think you might have heard that in career development class. Wait no you didn’t, who are you kidding. Oh well you put on the song anyway.

9:51 pm, You could have been a background dancer if you wanted to you say to yourself, but no you’re ‘studying’ for an exam instead. Exhausted from your crazy hip dance moves you lay down on your bed just for a second or two.

10:07 pm, Your favorite show has come on and you decide you’ve worked hard enough for the night, you settle in and leave your materials out. Oh well, Rome wasn’t built in a day you say to yourself.

11:01 pm, The show ends and you remember that sleep is also integral to a good score on an exam, setting your alarm you drift into worry-free sleep.

6:47 am, You’ve overslept through your alarm, but hey what, like 30 people will see you for half the day? You throw on  some comfortable clothing and slip on your flops. Grabbing your keys you set off to WaWa.

7:12 am, You arrive later than you had hoped to WaWa probably because of those people who never let you in, and the five busses all with their stop signs out that you passed. You need more coffee, no a frozen drink, water, fruit, a sandwich, and 2 packs of gum. Always need gum. You wait in the huge line and eventually pay.

7:24 am, You manage to make it on time to school despite the traffic guards and the 800 parents who drop off their kids, and who also for some reason have their purse sized dogs with more expensive haircuts than you.

7:31 am, walking in to the library you feel utterly prepared, I mean hey, you earned that feeling, you’ve taken a rigorous course and studied super hard, like once a week for the past I don’t know, week. Who cares about particulars, you talk to your classmates about what could be on it.

7:50 am, After talking with your extremely smart classmates you feel a little underprepared, no worries, nothing a little self talk and confidence can’t fix. You take your seat.

7:55 am, The guidance counselor inevitably tells everyone to move seats, and you reluctantly move away from your friends.

8:01 am, the counselor begins the mundane directions and you patiently wait to start

8:05 am, Go time baby!!

8:23 am, You feel pretty confident and have banged out a good amount of multiple choice questions. You glance around to see how everyone else is doing.

9:02 am, The multiple choice was okay and you definitely probably almost might have gotten around maybe 70 percent. Probably.

9:14 am, The much needed pee break is over, sadly, and you return to your seat.

9:18 am, You begin the writing section and look forward to being done…

10:01 am, You’re done one and have started writing the second. You’re pretty sure you’re doing okay..

10:59 am, You’re finally done all three, with a good amount of time to spare. You’re not sure whether it’s good or not, either way you take a swig of your water and fall asleep on the desk.

11:17 am, The counselor comes around to collect the booklets, and looks disapprovingly at the you, when you notice the drool mark on the writing book. Oh well, at least the test is over now.

11:23 am, You head to the bathroom confident and relaxed knowing the test is over and out of your hands. Chatting with your classmates your assure each other that you probably got a 4, but that a 3 was admirable as well.

11:30 am, you return to 3rd period with the swagger of an accomplished and esteemed scholarly student. Mission Accomplished. You compare yourself to the great Neil Armstrong, changing his famous quote, One small step for man, and one giant leap for my college credit.

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